This is a contribution from 17-year-old Kevin Morency from Beverly, Massachusetts.
Title image: Dexter
This one word keeps sticking out in my mind and I can’t seem to get rid of it. I try to live life to the fullest and focus on the happy times and good people but I’m human so of course I have my doubts and my worries and my concerns. It’s almost like a tree, beginning as just a little seed planted in the back of my mind. As time goes on, this seed is constantly being watered, drop by drop, by different thoughts of where my life is headed and what the future holds for me. As with every seed that is planted and watered, this thought in my mind begins to grow and sprout until its roots begin spreading and taking hold of my entire mind. Its branches grow tall and thick and I find myself caught in mental shadows that I can’t shake with the sun nowhere in sight. The branches include going off to college, moving away from home, leaving the people I hold near and dear to myself, all subject matters that make my heart heavy when I think about them. But there is one thing that I have in my back pocket, my secret weapon so to speak. To satisfy the tree metaphor I have already begun, I’d call it my axe or my chainsaw that helps me cut down this tree of anxiety that grows uncontrollably in my head.
Music is the single ray of sunshine that fights through the thick layers of leaves that cover the branches that shadow my mind. No canopy of doubt is strong enough to withstand the healing powers of music. “See I got GPS on my phone, And I can follow it to get home, If my location’s never unknown, Then tell me why I still feel lost.” If this was how Jon Bellion’s song, Human, ended then it would probably be considered a sorrowful and depressing track. However, despite this seemingly unanswerable question being the last audible words we hear from the Long Island singer/producer, the song is far from over. What follows is a string progression so beautiful that it could heal the soul of any person that takes the time to listen.
The wounds that are opened up by the final question asked are sown up by the instrumentation that follows. If it were possible to take the feeling of finding answers, of filling a hole previously left empty in your heart, of stepping into the light after being in the dark for so long, and put it into a sound, the ending strings in Human is what it would sound like. I take comfort in this, in the power of music. As humans we all feel lost sometimes. I know I have many times, especially when faced with life changing events that are approaching fast such as graduating high school and moving away from Beverly, the only place I’ve ever called home. But knowing that songs like Human will always be just a click or two away brings me peace. Whenever my soul needs healing, I can at least for the moment block out the world around me and let the music wash away my questions. I know in life we will always be searching for answers because we will always be faced with more questions. I also know there won’t always be an answer out there. But while I won’t be able to find some answers, I know I’ll be able to find myself in music.
So the future can cause me all the anxiety it wants; I may not know what college I’m going to or where exactly in the country it’ll be or how my friends and I will stay in touch or if we even will. But there’s one thing I do know. Music will always be a part of me. It was yesterday, it is today, and you can bet your college tuition that it will be in the future.